| Lyrics |
[16 Jul 2002|10:10pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 blank |
] |
I hit you and you hit me back
We fall to the floor, the rest of the day stands still
Fine line between this and that
When things go wrong I pretend the past isn't real
Now I'm trapped in this memory
And I'm left in the wake of the mistake, slow to react
Even though you're close to me
You're still so distant, and I can't bring you back
No matter how far we've come
I can't wait to see tomorrow
No matter how far we've come
I can't wait to see tomorrow
With you
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| Tried something |
[14 Jul 2002|01:20pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 irritated |
] |
Saw this on Lathander's journal. I'll give it a shot.
Name: Mendero
Do you like it?: What do you care?
Nicknames: No
Screen names: I'm not in a bloody boy band, so no.
Age: 15
Location: Hogwarts
School: Hogwarts
Status: Alive
Crush: No
Virgin?: Wanna die?
Natural hair colour: Black
Current hair colour: Black
Eye colour: Black
Height: Six-one
Birthplace: Was found in a London alley
Shoe size: 14
Bra size: One more stupid question and I'll...
[ family ]
Parents: Dunno
Siblings: Dunno
Live with: People on streets, for five years
Favourite relative: Got no one
[ favourites ]
Number: 1
Colour: Black
Day: Friday the 13th
Month: May
Song: Welcome to the Jungle, Guns N' Roses
Movie: The Godfather
Food: Anything edible
Band: Guns N' Roses
Season: Summer
Sport: Kicking butt
Class: Potions
Teacher: Snape
Drink: Orange juice
Veggie: Anything edible
TV Show: Beavis and Butthead
Radio Station: No
Store: Anyplace where I can afford what they're selling
Word: Nothing
Animal: Snakes
Flower: Orchids
State: No
[ love and relationships ]
Do you have a bf/gf?: No
Do you have a crush?: No
How long have you liked him/her?: I said no
Why do you like this person?: ^growls^
How long was your longest relationship?: Never been in one
How long was your shortest relationship?: See above
Who was your first love?: Not yet
What do you miss about them?: Doesn't apply
[ the past ]
What is the one thing you would change about your past?: Dunno
What is the biggest mistake you've made in your life?: Being born, kinda
Last thing you heard: Some stuff. Not important.
Last thing you saw: Some stuff
Who is the last person you saw?: The geisha girl
Who is the last person you kissed?: No
Who is the last person you hugged?: No
Who is the last person you fought with?: Ain't enough space here for that one
Who is the last person you were on the phone with?: Dunno
What is the last TV show you saw?: Dunno
What is the last song you heard?: You're a God, Vertical Horizon
[ the present ]
What are you wearing?: School uniform
What are you doing?: Writing here
Who are you talking to?: Myself
What song are you listening to?: Radios and stuff don't work around here
Where are you?: Here
Who are you with?: No one
Are you online?: ^growls^
How are you feeling?: Wanna kick something and hear it break
Are you in a chatroom?: This is getting stupid, man
[ future ]
What day is it tomorrow?: Tuesday
What are you going to do after this?: Go to class
Who are you going to talk to?: I don't talk, not really
Where are you going to go?: Away from where I've been
How old will you be when you graduate?: 19, if I live that long
What do you wanna be?: Someone not stupid enough to leave their kids for dead
What is one of your dreams?: I don't dream
Where will you be in 25 years?: Dunno
[ have you ever ]
Drank?: No. These things mess with the head.
Smoked?: See above
Stolen?: Yeah
Done anything illegal?: Yeah
Wanted to die?: I died once
Hit someone?: I count them, you'll sleep, when you wake up, I'll still be counting 'em.
[ other ]
Do you write in cursive or print?: Print
Are you a lefty or a righty?: Lefty
What piercings do you have?: No
Do you drive?: I can drive a car, also a motorcycle
Do you have glasses or braces?: Wanna get some specs
Did you love this survey?: If this survey's a person, it'd be dead by now
|
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| Hogwarts sky |
[26 Jun 2002|05:19am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
cynical |
] |
Someone told me there's an assembly in the Great Hall. Bet it'll be on the game gone bad this afternoon.
Didn't feel like being with people, so I snuck out the place and sat around under the sky. Back in London, I used to look up at the sky, flat on my back on a piece of cardboard.
I'm now wearing clothes that are sort of better and I'm not so hungry like I used to be. But there's no one to talk to at Hogwarts. Back then Frankie and Roshi would tell me that they don't bloody believe in falling stars but make a wish when they see one anyway.
I don't believe in making wishes.
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| Messed up |
[16 Jun 2002|06:30am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 confused |
] |
I don't know why she's affecting me so much. Maybe I feel sorry for her. She keeps on apologizing like she's the reason why my life's the way it is.
She even kissed me.
All I know for sure's I'm gonna stay out of Niamh's way. I won't like it and I'll feel like a bastard, but at least she doesn't have to put up with a bum.
Hope she won't throw the scarf away. Would mean a lot if she kept it.
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| Specs |
[13 Jun 2002|04:15am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 thoughtful |
] |
Think I'd look snappy if I got some specs?
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| I feel sick |
[10 Jun 2002|06:59am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 morose |
] |
Frankie and Roshi told me that Hogwarts was the chance to get myself off the streets and save what's left of me for the future.
But who the bloody hell will save me from me? Because when I go around the place meeting people I feel like I'm something that makes them sick.
Even the sound of my voice makes people sick. Who can blame them?
|
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| Some Game |
[30 Apr 2002|03:51am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
sleepy |
] |
At Hogwarts for two, three, weeks already but it's not bloody different from the rest of the world. Magic's not what it's cracked up to be in the books and in the movies.
In the magic world there're still wimps and idiots and brats who think they're special just because they can blubber some Latin and make a piece of stick spout water like a faucet. I feel bloody sorry for them because they'll never find out how it's like to live in the real world. Poor kids.
I'm on the field bleachers like the ones on football stadiums and I've staked out on the highest level. There's this game the school is playing 'gainst another school, where they whack and throw balls at one another. Maybe it'll end when someone dies or falls off or breaks his neck. Not any different from gangland basketball.
I'll try to get some sleep. Haven't been sleeping much lately. Keep on thinking about illusions...stuff I used to do back on the streets to keep the moochers off my back. Sleep, yeah.
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| Hogwarts |
[26 Feb 2002|09:14pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
morose |
] |
I'm here. Sorted to a house called Slytherin, where we get snake pins and wear green cloth-things on our robes. Green is okay. I saw other people wearing red, yellow and blue. Blue okay but others not. Too girlie.
My first class is Defense Against the Dark Arts. What is Dark I don't really know. Magic is magic, right? Maybe it depends on who uses it, and for what.
I don't want to bloody think. Magic screws with my head.
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| Off the streets |
[11 Feb 2002|06:42pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
cynical |
] |
Got the letter this summer. It got by three owls in the middle of the day when me and Roshi and Frankie were eating Burger King scraps. Wicked trick, we all said.
Hogwarts School didn't sound too real. Thought some stoned bloke snuck 'lucinogens or some high-shot crack into the scraps in the trash. But didn't seem so.
Bloody scares me. I could do tricks since I was nine. Larry was still alive back then, and he said it was all crap, my illusions. I could do the best monsters and it kept people off my back on the alleys when I was in tight scrapes.
I don't know what'll happen. I got a wand and books and some clothes that kind of fit but not really.
Magic's something I don't really believe in. Crap that got me off the streets, but for how long I don't know. Don't care much either.
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mendero's journal
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